Kirsten Kell, MFT

I enjoy working with couples doing marriage preparation or pre-marital counseling. I think the research on the success rates of marriage counseling can be disheartening. One of the reasons suggested for poor results of marriage counseling is that couples seek help when one or both of them has already given up hope or a major transgression has already occurred in the relationship. I believe passionately in pre-marital counseling for several reasons. Through this type of counseling couples can be sure to really look at common areas of conflict for couples. They can identify areas that might create problems for them and they can start to create a plan for how to handle these problems. Also by having the experience of couples counseling early on both partners can experience the counseling process. In doing so I hope they each experience that the goal is not to assign blame or to fix the other person. But instead to learn about yourself and to reveal this true self to your partner and to work together to resolve the problems you will encounter. I also hope they each experience that counseling doesn't have to be painful and it doesn't mean there is something seriously wrong with them or their relationship. With this experience behind them I hope they will be more likely to seek help in the future before their problems are so large or so entrenched the work to resolve them seems overwhelming.

My practice focuses on working with couples to increase their intimacy and deepen their connection to each other. I believe that families are the foundation of society and couples are the foundation of families. In order to raise healthy, resilient, well adjusted children it is essential to have a solid couple relationship. I truly believe that helping people to reveal themselves to their partner and to be curious about really knowing each other creates a powerful connection that is the underpinning of a healthy society. The process of doing this can feel really risky and scary. It is an honor to me that people will allow me to guide them through the process and to witness the results of their efforts.